I Tried to Leave

I was feeling depressed and overwhelmed and inadequate during church today so I got up to leave. My plan was to quietly slip out the back door. It was locked. I was immediately irritated, because if there'd been a fire or a gunman or any kind of emergency we'd only have one escape. My course of action foiled, I was left with two alternatives. One was to stay, which was unbearable. The other was to go out the front. Everyone had already seen me walk up the stairs, and now they got to watch me walk back down and around the chorister (the ideal time to leave is during a hymn, assuming the back is open). Unfortunately I made eye contact with the bishop and he sent Brother and Sister B. from South Africa after me, and they convinced me to stay for the remainder of the meeting. It was awesome to be watched yet again by the entire ward during a talk as I was escorted back inside and seated smack-dab in the middle of the front row so people could stare at the back of my head and wonder what was wrong with me and why my hair was so frizzy. I met with the bishop later and talked for about an hour. He didn't minimize or trivialize the things I've been going through, or draw a stick-figure-me with arrows pointing inwards. Instead he gave me some encouraging advice and I am starting to feel hope for the future. I'm doing a lot better now.