He Tried to Kill It

I went on an eight mile hike on Saturday which was kind of dumb because I probably haven't walked eight collective miles this whole summer. But I really wanted to go. Not even a quarter of the way up the mountain (so we're talking about 1 mile in) I realized just what a bad idea it was. I'm not in very good shape and my shoes were flat and worn out. I was the slowest of the group, and I was amazed how I kept apologizing for being slow, the other hikers would assure me it was perfectly fine but minutes later mention how it was taking longer than they remembered. That's because I was the bowling ball chained to their feet. Oh well. I saw a pheasant and a deer and right by the top we heard a rustling and I saw a rattlesnake right by the path. It was probably three feet long! Most of us continued on, but one guy with some kind of manly vendetta against innocent wildlife tried to kill it and instead only partially crushed it. So beware the angry, half-dead snake if you plan on going up there any time soon. We reached the summit right at sunset and found a hiker who had climbed straight up the cliff face and was consequently lost because he couldn't climb down it in the dark and he wasn't aware there was a path. He called 911 but they told him they wouldn't rescue him unless he was injured, so he's lucky we found him. Especially because he was to give his farewell talk at church the next day as he's about to leave on a mission. It would've been kind of awkward if he went missing instead. I think the descent took less time than the climb, though it was dark and I was talking to the rescuee and focusing so hard on not stumbling that it's hard to say for certain. We passed two people walking their dog but their dog was big and black and I saw it before the people so I shrieked and jumped and the dog growled but an instant later we saw its owners and we laughed and the dog wagged its tail. Dogs are smart. What an adventure. Only my legs are really stiff and sore and I need to buy groceries today.